Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I can text with my tongue
only you would photoshop your dick
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
