Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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