Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
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