It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
