How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
