Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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