We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
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im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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