I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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