Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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