is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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