that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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