I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
