dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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