Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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