She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
COCAINE IS GR8
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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