My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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