i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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