the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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