I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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