And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
