we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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