told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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