his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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