Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
