everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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