I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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