I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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