Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize