I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Randomize
