Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
