shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
