I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
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He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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