so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
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Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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