VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
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Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
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I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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