There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
it's great music for shaving your balls
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
