this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
