I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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