Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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