I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
