Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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