UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
