She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
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