it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
