why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
