her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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