what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
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