How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
