Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him laugh his dick is mine
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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