So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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