I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
